The True History of Jesus of Nazareth

Jesus was born back in the olden days, when the Romans were still bootin about. He was a Jew and poor. The Romans were nasty to Jews and to poor people.

He said we should all be good to each other, and not be nasty. Lots of people didn't like it when he said this.

They nailed him to a cross and he died.

He was a good bloke.

This is a picture of baby jesus by Gerard Von Honthorst. It is not an accurate depiction, for babies do not glow. And here is another picture of Jesus giving a sermon by Carl Bloch. It is probably also not an accurate depiction, for people were poor and dirty in the olden days, and Jesus was a good bloke who did not hold forth like a wanker.
And here is another picture of Jesus on the cross by Cristo Velazquez. It might well be an accurate depiction of Jesus. Except the glowing head bit. People's heads don't glow.




And here is another picture of Jesus resurrection from the dead by Matthias Grunewald. It is rather idealised. Jesus didn't fly around like a wizard with a big glowing balls behind him and a beatific expression on his face, and alas people don't rise from the dead.